In Lieu Of Flowers

While reading the Obituaries in my local paper one day I came across something that left me smiling, which one doesn't usually do while reading the Obits.
After the usual information about his life, it went on to say...
In lieu of flowers, please take your father,son, mother or daughter out for lunch. Time is all we have together; enjoy it while you can.

More Blessings

To continue with my insomnia solver...
N...Newspapers
O...Oranges
P...Policemen
Q...Quilts
R...Refrigerators
S...Sisters
T...Television
U...Underwear
V...Vacuum Cleaners
W...Wine
X...X-rays
Y...Yawning
Z...Zippers
Try this if you can't sleep some night. It is sure to send you off to slumberland.

Counting My Blessings

Sometimes when I am having a touch of insomnia, I try counting my blessings, starting with A and going through the alphabet.
A..Apples
B...Books
C...Computers
D...Daughters
E...Eyes and ears
F...Friends
G...Grandchildren
H...Health
I...Internet
J...Jewelry
K...Knowledge
L...Luggage on wheels
M...Mothers
About this time I fall asleep so will continue this practice next time.

Old ladies and modern technology

I believe that the age of technology came along too late for me to deal with. I recently decided to change my telephone provider to the same company which I use for Cable TV and Internet. This way there would be one bill and it was even going to cost less. I would get a digital box attached to my TV which would give me several more channels. I never did find out what channels they were, but the servicemen spent some time setting everything up. To turn the TV on was much more complicated. I needed to press three buttons instead of one, and they had to be in the right order. That evening I got so upset over it all that I phoned the help line. He helped me get the thing going but when I mentioned something about the VCR, he told me that it would not work with this set up. He began to tell me what I could buy and install so that I could use it.I was almost in tears by now and said that I was too old to understand what he was talking about. Nice man, he offered to send someone out to fix it for me.
The fellow arrived yesterday and I asked him to take the box away and put things back the way they were. This is what he did , in a matter of minutes. I still have all three things with the same provider but don't have to deal with any new stuff.